So how does an addict like me become ‘sober’?  Because being uninformed feels irresponsible.  That willful ignorance practically reeks of entitlement, and we’re all quick to judge those who have the luxury of not knowing much about the latest war or genocide.  But I also don’t want to be in a constant state of anxiety or depression over events that are beyond my control.

If you’ve experienced infertility or pregnancy loss, then what I am about to say might sound familiar: grief, it turns out, is a series of contradictions. It’s raging that someone else has what you cannot have, while resenting that anger because no one should have to go through the same thing. It’s withdrawing from everyone while also needing people to care about you. It’s suffering while wanting to feel joy for other people. It’s feeling guilty while rationally knowing that it isn’t your fault.